What About Socialization? How Homeschoolers Really Connect

Aka the question every single person asks when you say you homeschool. You know the one.
Okay. Let’s just go ahead and say it together:
“But what about socialization?”😅

If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me that, I could probably buy a year’s worth of printer ink and crunchy snacks. Maybe even a coffee I don’t have to reheat five times.
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Here’s the thing. I used to worry about that too. Like, deeply. When we were just starting out, I remember lying awake at night thinking, “What if my kids turn out weird?” (Spoiler: they really are already weird, but in the best kind of way.)

So I mean, I get why people ask. It’s not a bad question, really. I mean, we’re used to seeing kids in big groups at school every day, and that feels like socialization. It’s loud, and it’s structured, and there’s recess and lunch tables and group projects and birthday cupcakes with the wrong kind of frosting. It’s what we ALL consider the norm. So pulling your kids out of that can feel…risky.

But here’s what I’ve learned:

Socialization doesn’t have to look like a classroom full of 28 kids born in the same calendar year.

In fact, I’m kinda glad it doesn’t. Because if we are really, really honest about it, thats not actual true socialization. Socialization in homeschool is very different. And honestly? I love that about it.

My kids hang out with toddlers and teens and grandparents and new babies and yes, other homeschoolers too. One of their favorite people they see is Rita from church.  They make friends at co-op, church, sports, library programs, and in line at Jungle Jims when we’re all melting down and someone’s baby throws a snack cup. 

These kids and I have real conversations. We’re not just managing behavior for six hours a day—we’re living life together. And yeah, sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes I’m like, “Wow, we need to work on interrupting” or “Can you please not ask the neighbor if they believe in the Loch Ness Monster at 8 a.m.?”

But I really believe this is the best type learning. They are literally watching me model life for them. Learning how to talk to people of all ages, how to listen, how to be bored and make up games, how to apologize when they mess up, how to be themselves without the pressure of fitting in or following some 3rd grade lunchroom hierarchy.

And honestly? I’m learning too.

I’m learning to stop comparing.

I’m learning to trust that connection doesn’t have to be crowded.

I’m learning that “socialization” might just mean raising kind, curious, slightly awkward humans who know how to hold a conversation and make the best out of a rained-out park day.

So yeah. If you’re wondering if your homeschooled kid will be okay socially? I just wanna say:
You’re not crazy for thinking about it. It’s okay to be unsure. But I promise, you’re not ruining them.

They’ll find their people. You will too. And if not—come over. We’ll be your people. ❤️

Lori
​To know God and to make Him known